When Grief Interrupts Everything
Grief doesn’t always give us time to prepare. Sometimes, it arrives suddenly—shocking, brutal, and permanent. On this episode of Grief 2 Growth, I spoke with Diandra Ford-Wing, a fellow African-American professional, storyteller, and soul traveler who, like me, experienced the sudden, life-altering loss of a loved one.
Diandra’s story is not just about grief—it’s about what we do with it, how we respond, and how we honor those we’ve lost by creating something meaningful in their name.
Her debut novel, Red Bird, was born out of that sacred transformation. This blog dives deeper into our raw, honest conversation—one that mirrored my own experience of losing my daughter, Shayna, without warning.
Diandra’s Life Before the Storm
Before grief knocked on her door, Diandra was building a successful career in tech sales. Her days were structured, fast-paced, and goal-oriented. But underneath the productivity, there was a foundation—her mother, Sandra.
“She was the person I talked to every day,” Diandra told me. “She was light. She was comfort.”
Sandra was an educator, a mentor, a mother, and Diandra’s best friend. Their connection ran deep, filled with daily phone calls and shared laughter. Then, one day, the calls stopped.
The Call No One Ever Wants
It happened during the pandemic. Diandra’s sister, worried about not hearing from their mother, went to check on her.
“I was on a work call when my sister FaceTimed me,” Diandra said. “She was screaming. I knew something was wrong.”
Sandra had passed away unexpectedly.
What followed was a blur of emergency calls, disbelief, and a scream that Diandra says came from somewhere deep in her soul. “I didn’t cry. I screamed. Then I went quiet. I haven’t cried since,” she admitted.
The Fog of the First Year
Many people expect grief to look like crying and collapsing. But sometimes, grief is quiet. It’s numbness. It’s disbelief that stretches into weeks and months.
Six months into a new job, Diandra did something bold: she walked away.
“I just stopped. I couldn’t fake it. I needed space to feel what I was feeling.”
That space became a sacred container for grief. It wasn’t easy. But in the stillness, something surprising happened—her grief began to speak.
A Visit from the Red Bird
Like many of us who’ve lost someone suddenly, Diandra longed for a sign. She wanted a dream, a whisper, a visit—anything to feel Sandra’s presence.
“I said out loud, ‘Why haven’t you come to me?’ I was angry.”
Hours later, a red cardinal appeared on her balcony. Not once. But over and over. It sat. It stared. It sang.
I’ve heard stories like this before—because I’ve lived them. In my own grief journey after Shayna passed, signs became my lifeline. Cardinals, dreams, synchronicities—they weren’t coincidences. They were conversations.
Writing Red Bird: From Journal to Healing Tool
That cardinal sparked something in Diandra. She began journaling—simple reflections, short letters, bits of dialogue between grief and grace.
What started as personal processing evolved into something more.
“I thought—what if this could help someone else?” she said.
That “what if” became Red Bird, a novella-style book designed to be read in a day or two. But its emotional depth stays with you long after the last page.
It’s not just a story—it’s an invitation to feel.
Shayna’s Story: My Own Journey with Sudden Loss
As Diandra spoke, I couldn’t help but reflect on my own experience.
In 2015, I lost my 15-year-old daughter Shayna suddenly. Healthy one day, gone the next. No warning. No goodbye.
The pain was—and is—unimaginable. But like Diandra, I was called to transform that pain. To speak about it. To write. To start Grief 2 Growth. Because like her, I believe our loved ones don’t leave us. They change form. They keep talking. We just have to listen differently.
Generational Grief and Family Mysteries
Diandra shared a powerful story about her aunt, Audrey, who passed away unexpectedly while serving in The Gambia. The circumstances were mysterious. The grief compounded.
The family eventually decided to bury her there, honoring what felt like a soul-level calling.
There’s a throughline in Diandra’s family—a pattern of sudden loss. But also a legacy of strong women, intuitive decisions, and deep spiritual insight.
“My mom said she always knew she wasn’t going to live long,” Diandra remembered.
The Signs Keep Coming: New Life, Same Date
Here’s where things got eerie—in a good way.
Sandra passed on February 21. Exactly one month later, Eden Kaye—her great-granddaughter—was born on March 21.
The timing felt too precise to ignore. It was as if something had been completed and begun in the same breath.
“She came in with her light,” Diandra said. “And now, every time I look at her, I see my mom.”
What Black Grief Looks Like
One of the most important parts of our conversation centered on how Black families process grief.
“We don’t always talk about it,” Diandra said. “We’re taught to be strong. But silence doesn’t heal.”
Grief is universal. But it’s also cultural. In Black communities, the pressure to move on, be resilient, and stay quiet can be overwhelming.
This is why Red Bird matters. Why this podcast matters. Because breaking the silence creates space for healing—not just for us, but for future generations.
Leaving a Legacy Without Children
Diandra made another bold choice in her life: she doesn’t plan to have children.
For many, legacy is tied to lineage. But Diandra challenges that idea.
“My book is my baby. It’s what I leave behind,” she said.
And she’s right. Legacy isn’t only about blood. It’s about impact. Red Bird is already touching lives—and so is her voice, her story, and her courage.
Key Takeaways
Sudden grief is disorienting—but it can become sacred when given space
Signs from the other side are real—and deeply personal
Grief in Black communities deserves a voice—and we must break the silence
Storytelling heals—for both the writer and the reader
Legacy is not about biology—it’s about soul work
Final Reflection: What’s Your Red Bird?
Have you experienced a sign like Diandra’s red cardinal? A moment where someone you lost made their presence known?
You’re not alone.
These signs aren’t hallucinations. They’re conversations from another place—one filled with love, purpose, and connection.
Let this story be your reminder: you’re never as alone as you feel.
💬 Join the Conversation
We’d love to hear from you. Share your story of sudden loss, signs, or spiritual transformation at:
Or connect with Diandra:
📚 Buy Red Bird: booksbydiandra.com
📷 Follow on Instagram: @diandrafordwing
🧡 Support the Podcast
If this story touched you, please:
💬 Leave a comment or review
🔁 Share this post with someone who’s grieving
▶️ Subscribe to the podcast for more soul-nourishing episodes
I know there are a lot of newsletters you can support, and subscription fatigue is real. If you’d like to leave a one-time donation, it would be very much appreciated. Click the image below to leave a tip.
Share this post